Self Steam.

Ever wake up one day and feel like you're hotter than Americas next top model and then the very next day feel like Oprah off her diet(without the fame and fortune)? Is this normal? How can we balance our crazy imbalanced psyche?? I think of myself as two different women;The Sarah that feels confident, positive and inspired and can take on the world with out a second thought. She feels comfortable in her own skin and she smiles all day long. This Sarah is my favorite. But then.. There is other Sarah..Lets call her Sarha. (OK not very clever but its the best i could come up with for now) So Sarha wakes up and she feels fat,ugly,stupid,incompetent and completely invisible in the world. She just wants to be noticed, she is so needy, making the ones around her very drained. Where did Sarah go? This girl sucks! Ok for the record i am not Bi-Polar.. at least i think I'm not. I guess we could blame it on hormones.. and guys don't act like you don't have ugly days! You get your man periods and are more moody than we could ever be.(Love you though) So how can we cope with this multiple personality disorder?? Well i am no expert but i think its ok to be Sarha once and a while, she keeps me in check, she lets my ego stay modest and she reminds me I'm human and that its ok to have "UGLY" days. The thing I'm learning is feelings aren't reality sometimes so lets just learn to embrace, deal with, and move on. Lets face it positive thinking is great but we cant fake it all the time. So be positive, be confident but love the other you too, accept that your not always gonna feel hot and that's ok! There is beauty in the imperfections! Embrace every part of who you are and live to the fullest.. Oh and put down the candy bar and get your butt moving!!
XOXO
sarah :)

Oh, This is Life?

Who am I?
Does anyone still feel like they are waiting for their life to start? My whole life i had this idea of what i thought life would be like. I wanted to meet a man who was head over heels in love with me, become a famous singer and live somewhere cool where everyday felt like i was in this world for a purpose. Well I'm a 30 year old single mom who sings but for little money and lives in the town i loathed as a kid. Hmmm..what went wrong here? In this last year i have learned that LIFE HAS STARTED! No magic man or money will make my life all of a sudden complete. The journey is the life and it never ends, until you die that is.. but thats another story. Internal peace is what i yearn for. No, i have not found my niche in this world but i want to start enjoying the non niche life. There is beauty in every struggle if you look hard enough. The people surrounding you, the experiences you have, and the memories you make are the true "Who am I's" Cliche, yes, i know but Cliches have a point! We all have this idea of who we should be and lets be honest most of us fall short. There will always be someone more beautiful, more interesting maybe even more awesome!(If that's possible) but like my mom always told me "What someone else has has nothing to do with what  you have." So if you are waiting for your life to start..WAKE UP, ITS HERE! Go be a force in this world, believe with your whole heart, don't be afraid to fail! You know that thing in the back of you mind that you have always wanted to do, but something has held you back? Well go do it! We live ONE life! Make it count!!!!! Oh and EAT WELL!
XOXO
Sarah :)

If you feel it it's real, Right?

Emotions are a very powerful thing, they can literally control your perception of who you are, how others perceive you and how you view your self both physically and mentally. A friend of mine said to me over the weekend that she cant imagine how i wouldn't have high self esteem. I guess i can blame it on issues in my past or being an over weight teen. I could also blame it on rejection issues, past boy friends who have cheated on me,and of course the infamous "Daddy Issues". The thing about emotions are they are totally feelings based. If you feel sad, are you actually sad? If you look in the mirror and see a fat person, does that actually make you fat? I'll give you an example. I went to the beach the other day and not once in my life have i ever feel comfortable in a bathing suit,NOT ONCE! So 40lbs lighter i still feel like an uncomfortable teen. I never liked swimming or the beach simply because of the vulnerability of being exposed in basically what not much different than underwear. I almost envy those big girls out there strutting around in bikinis. (NOT THAT I CONDONE THAT) but to be comfortable in ones skin is a foreign concept to me. My perception of myself is very powerful and it can make or break my whole day. We spend way too much of our lives comparing to one another. Who has a better body, better job, better car etc. What must it feel like to be completely content in who I am, even if ill never have what "she" has. This is something i strive for. Of course we should never settle and we should always want to progress, otherwise, we will become boring and lazy. What I'm talking about it self confidence, that feeling of self. Its ok to have emotions, to be sad or angry or feel ugly once and a while, but its not ok to let those feelings consume you. Take it from me, I'm learning everyday that happiness is a choice. Self Esteem takes work and discipline. We all have a past, we all have our issues but i choose happiness with moments of sadness rather than sadness with moments of joy. Make the choice today, don't let emotions rule your life. No matter how you feel about yourself in this moment, you can change your mindset! So start today! What are you waiting for??

Sar robics

Guess what, you will now have a visual inspiration! I will be doing a monthly how to video,explaining simple ways for anyone to start an exercise and diet plan eat and most importantly how to live!!! Think of me as your own little inspirational tour guide! I am by no means a professional trainer but I have lost almost 40lbs and feel I can help those who will listen! I've been in both ends of the spectrum and I know how it feels to be in a slump,to feel overwhelmed or like can't do it,but trust me you can! Start your journey to a healthy life NOW!!!!

WHY FAT BARBIE?

OK!
i should apologize in advance for any spelling,grammar or other mistakes that i will be most definitely be making as i go along..
That being said, you may being wondering why i chose the name "Fat Barbie" Well its a bit of an oxymoron because barbie is not fat and if she was it would most likely be "Regular Size" Our expectations of how we should look are usually so far off from whats a healthy weight. This isn't some cheezy "how to loose 10lbs in a day" gimmick. This is real life, you cant just go on a diet you have to live a certain way to see and keep results. Trust me if i can do it, ANYONE can!
XOXO

Sarah :)

Body Dysmorphia

So I'm in the Acme in my town and i run into this woman i used to work with. She doesn't recognize me because she said I've lost so much weight and then says as she walks away "Don't gain it back." As I'm checking out i have with me a weight watchers yogurt, not because i particularly like WW but because it was a nifty flavor. The cashier says "I hope you are not on WW." In that moment i realize i am not the overweight girl anymore. Although when i stand in front of my mirror all i see are the flaws i still have. Even after going from a size 14 to a size 6 i still don't feel like I'm "In Shape". I guess we never really see what others see because we are too busy looking at our imperfections. I only hope i can enjoy it before I'm old and wrinkly!
I hope my silly little stories about my wieght loss journey can be helpful to those out there fighting the same battle. Our bodies are our temples and its time we start being nice to the temple!